Wednesday, 21 March 2007

You Can't Hug a Child with Nuclear Arms

Protect and Survive - Nuclear Explosions Explained [1:29]

If you are netsurfing and a nuclear bomb detonates in your neighbourhood, you might want to give the following PIF a quick watch. [In case you came of age in the 1990s, PIF means Public Information Film. Apparently there are plans to start making updated PIFS that take the 'new realities' into consideration] Then go put out the bonfire that is your house, talk some sense into those nasty looters in front of what used to be your house, quickly dig a hole for shelter [or body disposal] behind what used to be your house, and kiss your ass goodbye.

Protect and Survive - What To Do After An Attack [2:31]

Despite the timeless wisdom that these highly entertaining and informational videos were attempting to impart me with, I couldn't help but think that during a nuclear exchange everyone I knew was going to die and the only survivors would be the politicians and military elite who started the whole damned thing in the first place. Oh, Karma where are thou?

Luckily, things are far less stable now and I don't have to worry about those nasty Russians dropping a few dozen megs on my humble chunk of the world. My only worry now is that rogue states might use nuclear, biological and/or chemical weapons, my own government will plan something weird, or the USA will make a serious grab for Canadian territory. [Please see War Plan Red - 'A 1935 US Plan for Invasion of Canada'] for confirmation that I'm not paranoid as I sound. And as ancient as War Plan Red sounds, the earliest invasion of Canada was proposed by Benedict Arnold in 1775. Later invasions took place in 1812, and smaller invasions were led by the Hunters' Lodges during the Patriot War [1837-1838] and the Battle of the Windmill [1838]. Finally, the Fenian's launched a series of raids against Canada between 1866-1871.

1 comment:

nitroglycol said...

I do think that if the Yanks decided to have a go at us (and they might, if their back isn't broken by someone else first) they'd be facing a long and nasty guerrilla war, and wouldn't be able to effectively extract our resources (which is presumably what they'd be after), because we'd be sabotaging the infrastructure they'd need to do that, and shooting the fuckers trying to do that. Of course, this would be devastating to both countries, but hopefully the prospect of this happening on their border might deter them from trying.

Then again, if that piece of shit Harper stays in power too long, they won't need to invade us at all.